Leadership Lessons from King David Part VI

Type image caption here (optional)

Be Kind to People

When we think of David, we think of a  strong person – a strong leader who was a warrior and a king over an  entire nation. This guy is got to be tough, resilient, unflinching, and  made of steel. Yes, David is all of that but we also see a kindness in  the way he treats people. This is especially seen in the story of (2  Sam.9:1-13), one of the most moving stories in the Bible.

David  was a kind leader who wanted to honour his friends and their families.  He wanted to “show God’s kindness”. He had not forgotten his promise to  Jonathan (1 Sam.20:15, 42)

Mephibosheth, though crippled in his  feet, had his family’s land restored to him and always ate at David’s  table, simple because of his father, Jonathan’s, friendship with David.  He became like one of the king’s sons. David had experienced God’s  kindness, undeserved favour, and he often acknowledged this. 2 Sam  22:51. “He gives his king great victories; he shows unfailing kindness  to his anointed, to David and his descendants forever." NIV

Ps  18:35. You have also given me the shield of your salvation; your right  hand has held me up, your gentleness (you stoop down – NIV) has made me  great. NKJV

As leaders, God has given us a degree of authority.  That authority is to be used for ‘building people up’ not tearing them  down. Yes, there are times where we need to confront, but even then we  are called to ‘speak the truth in love’.

When we use our  authority to encourage people and to show kindness to them, it can have a  powerful impact. How do you treat the ‘little people’? Small acts of  kindness go a long way! It could be as simple as – a smile, a hello, an  apology, a ‘thank you’ (Bill Hybels story), an expression of interest,  or a small gift. Be Aware of Your Vulnerability to Temptation

Story  of David committing adultery with Bathsheba is well known, as are the  ongoing negative consequences of his actions (see 2 Sam.11:1-27). David  sends Joab off to battle and decides to stay home in Jerusalem (vs.1).  Maybe David is getting tired of fighting the battles himself and thinks  that he can take a back seat now. It is now about 10 years since he  became king. Has complacency set in? The ark of God is out in the field  of battle, not at home with David (vs.11). As a result, he places  himself in a vulnerable position. There is no urgent cause or purpose to  which he is directing his energies. This puts him in a situation where  he is distracted, tempted and then drawn away into sin.

David  breaks four of the Ten Commandments (Ex.20:13-17). This sin brought the  death penalty (Lev.20:10. Deut.22:22). One sin leads to another and to  further deceit. David commits adultery then tries to get Uriah to sleep  with his wife so he’ll think that the baby is his. However, Uriah  responds nobly and in so doing puts David’s actions to shame. David then  plots Uriah’s death.

David had shamelessly violated God’s laws  and he had abused his royal power, which the Lord had entrusted to him  to shepherd the Lord’s people (5:2; 7:7-8).

Oh, how the mighty  have fallen. Here is a man after God’s own heart who has been lifted  from the sheepfold and into a place of prominence and influence. God has  been good to him and he loves the Lord with all his heart. But, oh the  depth of sinfulness in the heart of every man! David lets down his guard  and then makes some decisions with awful consequences. He forgot or  shunned God’s law in his heart and deceived himself into thinking it  would be okay. He got caught up in a wed of temptation set by the enemy.

Thankfully,  when confronted (2 Sam.12) David’s response was “I have sinned against  the Lord”. No excuses, no “back-peddling”, no rationalisation or  self-justification. He was forgiven, though the consequences of his sin  continued to haunt him the rest of his life.

What a lesson for us  today. How vulnerable are we! We are made of the same stuff and have  the same potential for such senseless sin. God preserve us from this  kind of evil. Lead us not into temptation!

Many years ago, I heard some training by Ken Williams (Wycliffe) on The Battle for Sexual Purity and I found it very insightful.

 Sexual sin is rarely the result of a blow-out. Almost always, it's the  result of a slow leak. It's a slide, not a sudden fall. Every person  caught in adultery said, “I never thought it would happen to me!”

Understand the process of sexual sin. See the wisdom of God's ways and the consequences of disobedience.

There  are 5 stages in an inappropriate relationship – (1) appropriate  interaction, (2) inappropriate levels of openness, (3) unwise amounts of  time together, (4) inappropriate physical touch, (5) over the line.

2 and 3 create an ‘emotional connection’ or attachment.

Establish some ‘early warning’ signs. Don’t wait until you’re near the edge of the rapids!

Some reflection questions:

How are you going in the area of sexual temptation?

Married people – any inappropriate emotional connections? Do you have appropriate boundaries (time, location, actions, etc)?

Single people - any inappropriate physical touch?